Emergency Intervention with Your Teen

An intervention is crucial as soon as you discover your teen is using drugs and alcohol. Why? Recreational use can turn into abuse and addiction, and ruin their future dreams as well as yours. So, taking the issue seriously is mandatory. 

Making excuses for your teen where you condone the behavior by saying “it’s not as bad as it appears,” or you brush off the behavior as “what all teens are doing these days” will set your teen up for a lifetime of failure where they realize they can manipulate others to continue with destructive behavior. You must accept and confront the behavior to make changes. If you do not take this seriously, you will sabotage your teen’s future.

If your teen is acting out, then getting to the root of the problem will help to solve the issue. This is easier said than done, so let’s see if we can find some solutions that can work for you.

 

Objective to Master- 
Open up the lines of communication with your teen so you can understand why they are using drugs or alcohol or acting out.  An intervention really is just a conversation where you find out as much as you can to prevent future problems or issues around this topic. 

 

Weekly Goal -
How Well Do You Know the Teen in Your Life? How Can You Learn More to Find Out if an Intervention is Necessary?

Learn as much as you can about your teen with asking opened ended questions that elicit information. Want to find out more information on where they are going? 

 

Where are you going tonight?

Who are you going with?

How are you getting there?

When will you be coming back?

Call them during their evening to check in with them on where things are. Has anything changed? Do they need you?

 

To Snoop, or not to snoop? 

Some parents think it is not ok to snoop, but I disagree. If you truly care about the future of your teen, you will want to know exactly what is going on. How can you find out?

1. Search their room, backpacks or car for drugs.

2. Do you know how to see what websites your teens are using? Go to your Internet Explorer and hit control and then “h” to bring up the history of web sites.

3. What are they doing online anyway? Google their name to find out their MySpace account and take a look at this page. Teens reveal a lot of information about themselves.

4. Are they using virtual chat rooms? These are popular with teens and are very unsafe. If they are, be sure that you know which games they are playing. Explain to your teen that they are unsafe because they will never know if they are interacting with another teen their own age, or a predator. BEWARE-they should know to NEVER meet up with someone they meet in a chat room, or give them their personal information (address or phone number).

Know your own family history. Does addiction run in the family? If so, you will need to be sure that you are not in denial of the problem.

Change My Results NOW – How Do I Move on with my Life During a Crisis?

How do you stay positive when your world has been turned upside down? If you have a serious problem with your teen that is causing you stress, then you must take action now. Dr. Phil had an episode on Emergency Teen Interventions on Wed. May 19th. His advise from this show was to-It will take some time to work through these issues, but once you have stated your expectations, and your teen understands them, put your expectations in a contract so they are clear with the rules, and they understand that there are consequences for breaking these rules. Working with teens is not easy, by any means. I do know that understanding them is the key to figuring out why they are acting out. Once you can gain some understanding, you can begin to move towards a solution. The solution might not be what your teen wants to hear, but trust me, they will thank you when they have grown up, and have their own families to worry about.

 

 1. Strip the teen of their existence. Teens these days think they are so entitled. If they are not following the rules, they must face the consequences. Take them out of their environment. Teens in some countries are lucky to have shelter. Why do teens feel like they are owed so much? Its the parents fault. Do not give into their requests if they cannot follow the rules. Take away their cell phones and luxury items. Power corrupts them and they cannot handle this responsibility. Take it all away! Sell your house, quit your job, and live in a tin, before you let your teen rule your household. Show them who is in charge.

 

2. If this strategy fails, then send them to an outpatient program where they must learn how to live by the rules with structure on a daily basis. Get them off drugs and alcohol. He recommends the Turnabout Ranch in Aspen, CO.

 

3. If they run away from home, call the police and let them go to jail. Better safe in a cell, learning a lesson, than loose and unsafe on the streets.

 

4. Use “tough parenting” where you might not be popular, but you will prevent your teen from ending up dead in an alley somewhere. You also will be teaching them that they cannot make excuses for their actions when they show up late for work in the real world. Think of the message you are sending your teen if you do not teach your teen how to adhere to the basic responsibilities in life. They will be doomed, that’s for sure, and it will be your fault!

 

Teens have two jobs to do; get an education, and enjoy themselves as they are doing this. If they cannot do these two items, then they must be taken out of their environment so they can get back on track.  

 

If your teen is acting out, then you must act now!  You can only do so much, and then you must hand it over to a professional to force the desired results to occur. Don’t worry about not being liked. Worry about what “could” happen if you do NOT take action.

 

Use your intuition and gut feelings if something feels not right.

 

Do you know what your teen is up to? Do you know who their friends are and what they REALLY are doing on Saturday night? Ask questions about your teen’s life and you will be amazed at what they will share. Perhaps they will tell you things other teens are doing that they don’t like, and you can take that conversation as a teachable moment to discuss the negative outcomes of certain situations. Just keep asking questions. 

Try to find out as much as you can about your teen’s life by asking questions. Knowledge is power. The more you can find out, the easier it will be to work towards a solution. 

You can have a formal or informal intervention with your teen. A formal intervention is planned, and needed if you feel like they are addicted and need more assistance than you can provide. 

An informal intervention would work well for your first conversation with your teen. 

Are you asking questions about what your teen is doing and monitoring their actions? It is hard work, but being involved in your teen’s life is very important.

BIO-Andrea Samadi, author of The Secret for Teens Revealed and a former middle school teacher, has been a student of personal development since 1997.  She has worked with thousands of young people to help them put the paradigm-shifting concepts of The Secret into practice. She is currently launching The Teen Performance Magazine to help young people move steadily towards their goals and dreams. For more information, see

www.teenperformancemagazine.com.

How to Use Your Intuition to Achieve Your 2010 Goals.

Your intuition is another faculty of the mind that you must practice to develop.  With time, your intuition can be a very powerful tool that will help guide you towards whatever it is that you want. It’s that “inner voice” that tells you to do this, or do that. Have you ever heard this voice, and didn’t act on it, and later realized that you had missed an opportunity for something that you really wanted? Everyone has done this, as it takes time to develop your intuition, then more time to trust it and even more time to act on it. Hopefully, this lesson will give you some tips of where to start with strengthening your intuitive factors.

Try This FUN Activity for One Week –

When your phone rings, see if you can guess who is calling you (without looking at your call display). Listen to that inner feeling you get. Write down how many times you were right. This is your intuition at work!

If someone pops into your mind, write down their name. You might suddenly think of someone and you don’t know why, and before you know it, you have forgotten. If you can write down their name, it will be easier for you to remember your intuitive flash.

See if you can remember a time when you had a gut feeling or hunch about something that later came to be true. Did you act on it? What happened? These are the first steps to trusting that quiet voice from within.

If you don’t seem to have any intuitive flashes, that is perfectly normal and ok. Not everyone can “hear” or “feel” their intuition without practice.

How Can Your INTUITION help you?

If you have ever had to make a decision and you wonder if the choice is the best one, you can use your INTUITION to guide you. There is no need to seek outside counsel when you learn to listen to your inner gut feeling.  When you first start to practice this skill, you may wonder if you are really hearing your intuition, and you may at first mistrust your feelings and discount them as nonsense. Just see what happens and practice, until you begin to trust yourself.

Results – Is there someone in your family who is really good at using their INTUITION? Have them share their stories with you so you can hear their thoughts on trusting their inner guidance.

Change My Results NOW -
This is the KEY to SUCCESS in your life. If you want to change your results in any area, you just need to change your thoughts. It’s that simple! If you change your thinking to more positive thoughts, your level of vibration will change. You will notice that life will become more peaceful. Things will just become easier. Developing your higher faculties of your mind will give you an “edge” that will set you apart from others.

How to Develop Your Intuition-

1. Learn to become aware of your feelings. You will need to go somewhere quiet (I like to think before I go to sleep) and listen to what your body is telling you.
2. Once you have heard some messages or insights, learn to trust your inner guidance.
3. Start to act on small hunches and record your results.
4. Continue to meditate, listen to the quiet voice from within and take small steps with this information you are gathering from your higher self.
5. With time, you will have a sense of knowing when you act on your inner guidance. This is when you will step out with confidence and act on your hunches.

Feedback -
Check in with your family often and discuss their progress with their intuitive side.

Put it into Practice -
Hearing your intuitive messages takes practice and time. Some flashes of insight will come when you meditate. Others will come when you are in a relaxed state like exercising at the gym, or in the shower. You do not need to be asleep to access your higher self. Just learn to relax and let the insights flow!

Note: Substitute teacher for parent and classroom for family, and this activity can be conducted in the classroom for an excellent character education activity.

BIO-Andrea Samadi, author of The Secret for Teens Revealed and a former middle school teacher, has been a student of personal development since 1997. She has worked with thousands of young people to help them put the paradigm-shifting concepts of The Secret into practice. She is currently launching The Teen Performance Magazine to help young people move steadily towards their goals and dreams. For more information, see http://www.teenperformancemagazine.com

How to use your WILL to overcome obstacles, and move forward with your goals for 2010!

Weekly Goal - How to Use Your WILL to stay focused on your goals.
Your will is another one of the faculties of your mind that you can strengthen with practice, just like our muscles become stronger with exercise. The will is what you need to use to stay focused on your goals, and overcome obstacles. It’s the will that helps you hold your vision on the screen of your mind, overcome procrastination, and move steadily towards your goals and dreams. So, how do we develop this faculty of our mind? BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND YOUR DREAMS and then take the steps necessary to move towards them.

This is where your WILL comes into play. It takes effort to stay focused on your goals, but you must also work on eliminating all FEARS in your life. Some people never move towards their goals because they are afraid of something. You don’t have to be physically/mentally strong to have a STRONG WILL; you just have to eliminate your FEARS.

Some of the strongest people in the world were the least powerful physically, like Nelson Mandela who spent 27 years of his life in jail. He had no rights and no hope and did not know how he would even survive, but he was not afraid. He was spiritually strong, and used his WILL to stay focused on his passions. Mandela has received more than 250 awards over four decades, most notably the 1993 Nobel Peace Prize. In November 2009, the United Nations General Assembly announced that Mandela’s birthday, 18 July, is to be known as ‘Mandela Day’ marking his contribution to world freedom. This man mastered the use of his WILL to attain these achievements, after experiencing such adversity for so many years.

Try This FUN Activity for One Week –

December is the best month for goal-setting, since we can think about what we would like to accomplish next year. With your family, write out 5 goals you would like to accomplish next year. Write them down, and read them out to your family over dinner. Help each member of your family stay accountable to their goals by openly discussing their fears, to eventually eliminate them.

HOW CAN USING THE WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE?

My Mom used her WILL to overcome Uterine Cancer. She had 100% belief in herself that she could overcome anything, and she told me the key to her success was to eliminate all of her fears. To overcome this obstacle in her life, she had to not be afraid of dying. If you speak to anyone with a serious illness, this is their first concern, but this fear, will not help them to get better. Once you can eliminate this fear, there is nothing left to worry about, and you can begin to work on healing your body. This is exactly what my Mom did, and she is now ten years Cancer free.

Results - What’s happening with your family? Is someone really good at using their WILL? Keep practicing until everyone gets better!

Change My Results NOW -
This is the KEY to SUCCESS in your life. If you want to change your results in any area, you just need to change your thoughts. It’s that simple! If you change your thinking to more positive thoughts, your level of vibration will change. You will notice that life will become more peaceful. Things will just become easier. Developing your higher faculties of your mind will give you an “edge” that will set you apart from others.

How to Use Your WILL-

1. Put your fears out on the table and make a pact to eliminate them. Fears will only hold you back, but we all have them!
2. Hold your VISION on the screen of your mind, using your WILL. When you are emotionally involved with your goals, it will be more difficult to throw in the towel at the first obstacle or challenge.
3. Stay focused on 5 goals for 2010 and help your family members to stay on track with their goals.
4. Believe in yourself and this belief will keep you moving when things become difficult.

Feedback -
Check in with your family often and discuss their progress with their goals.

Put it into Practice -
Using your WILL is not easy. Your WILL is what gets you off the couch, out the door, and to the gym to work on your health. I had to use my WILL to write this newsletter! When something is important to you, JUST GET UP and DO IT!
Note: Substitute teacher for parent and classroom for family, and this activity can be conducted in the classroom for an excellent character education activity.

BIO-Andrea Samadi, author of The Secret for Teens Revealed and a former middle school teacher, has been a student of personal development since 1997. She has worked with thousands of young people to help them put the paradigm-shifting concepts of The Secret into practice. She is currently launching The Teen Performance Magazine to help young people move steadily towards their goals and dreams. For more information, see www.teenperformancemagazine.com.

AZ State School Superintendent, Tom Horne, Urges Teachers to Teach Exercise and Nutrition

State Superintendent of Arizona, Tom Horne, wants exercise and nutrition taught in the schools. He desires to encourage teachers to create lessons plans that explain why students should make healthier choices nutritionally.  Horne mentions that “You need to know the reasons. You need to know what the junk food does to you. You need to know what being sedentary does to you. You need to know why eating green vegetables are good for you.” Horne believes that with knowledge, behavior will change.

I could not agree more. As a former physical education teacher, and current health nut, I know that behavior needs to change to create new habits. But, before behavior changes, you will need to have a wake-up call about why your old behavior can be damaging your body, mind and spirit.  I was shocked when I realized that certain foods I was eating contained more calories than are recommended for my daily requirements. Education is the only answer for young people who are just starting to develop new habits.

Take it from Chad Bullock, the 19 year old NC teen who won the 2008 Teen Choice Award for his work in tobacco prevention. He understands the value of educating youth to make healthier decisions and his efforts are helping teens to think twice about lighting up. Bullock confirms that “many smokers are putting down the cigarette for a day and many are even quitting for good!”

What are you doing to make a difference with the lives of young people?

Columbine Lessons Help Other Educators Prevent School Violence

It’s been almost ten years since the Columbine Tragedy that changed so many people’s lives. I was changed and forever impacted from this day that happened April 20^th, 1999. I lived in Toronto, Canada; and Bob Proctor has just started his Youth Mentor International Program, and was working with the twelve original teens when we heard the horrible news of this tragedy. The teens Bob was mentoring decided to create their YMI pins in Columbine colors and honored those who lost their life on this day. They took the news of this day very seriously, and set out to be role models in their own high school environments.

 

As a former educator, I would say that this day affected me and continues to be the reason why I take such an interest in working with teens and self-esteem. Could Columbine have been prevented? I am not sure. But I do know that there are more programs out there than ever before the raise awareness to prevent school violence and I want to continue this message.

 

Colorado has a “Safe2Tell anonymous tip line that covers any potential threat to safety.” The program also includes anonymous and encrypted Web-tipping, says Susan Payne, special agent in charge of school safety and homeland security for the state. In the past 4½ years, the line has prevented 28 planned school attacks, she says. In one incident, there were 33 weapons found. About two-thirds of the calls come from kids, Payne says.

 

There is also the “Rachel’s Challenge” program that has a mission is to reach as many people as possible with the message of kindness and compassion. Rachel Scott was the first person killed at the Columbine tragedy. Her acts of kindness and compassion coupled with the contents of her six diaries have become the foundation for one of the most life-changing school programs in America.  

 

Awareness if always going to be the key to helping educators prevent school violence, but there are some steps that we can take as citizens as well. Encourage open communication with your teens and be aware of red flags that you might see that should be looked at closer. Always be aware, alert and perhaps with time and persistence, we can all make a difference and be inspired to help make this world a better place.

 

 

Words Can Change Someone’s Life!

Ask Matt, Soble, the 18 year-old essay winner of the “Stop the Hate! Youth Speak Out” essay content that turned his 500 word essay into a grand prize of $100,000 for a college scholarship, this past Sunday.

Matt wrote about his experience of stopping violent and abusive behavior towards another young man, with the power of words. “I’m in shock right now. I don’t know what to say,” Matt exclaimed upon winning first prize.

 

I was so happy to read this story, which explains that we all have to power to affect change in this world. We just have to stand up, and do something with our lives.  Instead of sitting back, and taking the easier road, with less conflict, Matt, chose the more difficult road, and was rewarded ten-fold.

 

Read this story to your teen and ask them, “Would you do the same if you saw someone being mistreated?” Let me know what they say, and then send me an email at andrea@secretforteens.com. This story reminds me of the moral behind the movie, The Kite Runner. We can make a difference if we step out and do something!

What is the Best Way to Teach Financial Literacy?

What a great question?  If I think back to my high school days, there was not one mention of how to be an entrepreneur and take charge of your finances.  Did you  know that seven out of ten people who live in California own their own business?  Where are these finance savy minds coming from? Well, Greg Fisher, an economics teacher at the California Academy of Math and Science, has a solid curriculum to guide his students “towards being smart money managers and business people.”  Check out this link to see his curriulum, and start to implement these ideas with the young people in your lives. 

I have a co-worker, Miguel Almaraz, who has shared with me some activities he does with his own children.  Instead of giving them what they ask for, Miguel asks his young children to save up for their wants, like a computer, and he will match what they save, as an incentive.  Talk about motivating his children with ideas comparable to our own 401K company match?  It’s just something to think about. As parents or role models for youth, our goals should be to develop these  young entrepreneurial minds so they can become self-sufficient in their own future.

Literacy and Social Intelligence

Have you ever thought of learning life lessons through literature?  Human emotions and life lessons are not a topics on the traditional Language Arts curriuculum, but during the past decade, researchers have found “evidence of the impact social-and-emotional-learning (SEL).”  The idea is to marry academic skills with social skills though discussing themes and lessons in literature.  Imagine classroom extension exercises that pair up students after a literature piece and have them solve problems like running away from home, or solving relationship issues?  Good literature will have a way at always touching our soul, but imagine if it could also solve social issues with youth as well!

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